Lessons from Barry

Thrill of thrills…I got to see Barry Manilow live in concert! He’s on his last “LAST” tour (he says he means it this time, ha ha), and as his biggest fan, nothing was going to stop me from seeing him when he came to the Midwest.

I’m Gen X (born 1965-1981). As expected, my age group was well represented at the concert, along with a fairly even number of Boomers (born 1946-1964). Looking around at our fellow concertgoers, the friend I came with wryly commented, “I don’t think anyone here is going to be throwing panties at the stage tonight.” Seemed a safe bet.

Once situated in our second-tier seats, I had a pretty good view of the fans streaming onto the main floor. I watched in awe as wheelchair after wheelchair, walker after walker, cane after cane, made its way in. Bad hips, arthritis, osteoporosis… NOTHING was going to stop these fans from spending an evening with the man.

Then I spied her. In rolled a woman on a SNAPnGO scooter, the same mobility scooter I’d given my mom two years previous. I instantly recognized the three-wheeled scooter from its distinctive logo on the back of the seat. Seeing it brought a wave of longing: I wish Mom was here. Now before you get all teary, my 86-year-old mother is still alive and doing well, but she lives 2000 miles away in California. I miss her tons. Watching this woman cruise in on the same mobility scooter made me miss her even more. To further matters, I noticed there was a woman about my age walking beside her. I wondered, not a little jealous, if it was her daughter. A mom/daughter night at a Barry Manilow concert. Perfection.

I decided to name the woman on the scooter “Lola” (ya know…Copacabana) because she was fashionably decked out in a silver sequined bomber jacket and a lit-up feather boa from one of the merch tables out on the concourse. I watched as she and her maybe-daughter made their way to their row. It was only after Lola got off the scooter that I understood why she needed it in the first place. While on the SNAPnGO scooter, Lola was confident, bold, enjoying life to its fullest. Off it, she walked in a slow shuffle, head down, concentrating on every single step. The fear of falling was palpable. Once safely seated, she reverted back to her animated self, looking around, laughing, excited for what was sure to be an amazing night. Not for the first time, I marveled at how a portable mobility scooter could revolutionize a person’s life.

As impressed as I was with Lola’s determination to see Barry, I was bowled over by Barry’s determination to perform for Lola (and the rest of us). The sultan of Soft Rock is 81 years old. He was born in 1943 which puts him in an age group called the Silent Generation. Like Lola, he’s made a decision that age is not going to stop him from doing what he loves. The entire arena held its collective breath as the red curtains parted and there he was! I trained my binoculars on him. He was a little stiff-legged perhaps, but the vocal cords were gold and he was FREAKIN’ AWESOME!!! He gave one hundred percent to the darkened arena, no doubt energized by the thousands of glow sticks swaying in time to his music. It was magic.

I’m always on the search for role models, so I watched Barry like a hawk, trying to figure out how he was able to put on such an incredible performance at his age. Then it came to me. He was like Lola. He’d figured out that simple adaptations allowed him to keep living the life he enjoyed. While Lola’s adaptation was a mobility scooter, Barry’s adaptation came in the form of carefully calibrated choreography and by surrounding himself with support people. As he side-shuffled back and forth across the stage, his backup singers safely surrounded him. He took strategic sit breaks at the piano. His costume changes of various tux jackets required only a few steps and/or the distraction of a video playing overhead while someone helped him change. Everyone in that arena knew what he was doing and didn’t care one whit. He’d found a way to keep living his best life and we were lucky enough to come along for the ride.